A Molecule in the Universe, Dust in the Wind

NOTE: This was written 03/03/2012, while I was employed as a direct-care provider; in the year 2020, I would be one of the frontline "essential personnel."
  The planet's [human] population is fast approaching eight billion and I am closing in on the end of my seventh decade. (jbd)

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A Molecule in the Universe, Dust in the Wind
   There are now over seven billion people inhabiting the planet we call Earth. This is double the number from my childhood. I was born a mere six decades ago, the proverbial 'blink of an eye' as time goes. So where did they all come from?
   Some are the result of artificial insemination, fertility drugs and the efforts of some overachievers, such as the infamous Octo-Mom. Still, who am I, indeed who are any of us, to say someone shouldn't be here? What determines an individual's right to live, their value? Though some denounce 'survival of the fittest' as a qualifier, that premise governed the existence of our species for millennia. Individuals who were physically incapable of supporting themselves and had no one to provide their needs, died. We now have means of keeping such persons alive - but at what cost? Indeed, we cull other living things; plants are thinned out, as well as livestock. Many indigenous peoples live or lived in cultures wherein separating oneself from the community when  weak and dying is viewed as "taking one for the team."
   With the institution of social programs to aid the less fortunate, some people feel they can dictate who is deserving of help. People are reluctant to pull the plug or deny costly services to helpless newborns, afraid to be labeled "baby killers." The stigma applies less stringently to the elderly, but we are loathe to admit a desire to save money by denying care to someone who will never be able to repay. (Note: In the face of the 2020 Covid-19 pandemic, this very thing is being seriously discussed/considered.)
   There have been models of  generosity through the ages: Buddha, St. Francis of Assisi, Jesus, Mother Teresa, Dorothy Day. They met need where they saw it without a lengthy interrogation to determine if the victim were "deserving."
   Some wonder why God allows suffering, while maintaining there is sufficient wealth to feed and care for all the world's inhabitants. Therein, I believe, lies the answer. The Creator gave us souls and free will and probably has hopes that we will use our gifts wisely. What constitutes wisdom? Do we make our own comfort a top priority and give scant concern to the welfare of others? If one is a member of the fortunate elite, does one then have an obligation to share one's good fortune? I am not defining "elite" as the top one or two percent who control obscene sums of the world's wealth and consume disproportionate amounts of the planet's resources. I speak of anyone who has an indoor supply of running water, an adequate amount of food and a place to sleep, sheltered from the elements.
   There are food chains in nature, but humans like to think of themselves as an "evolved" species, above such mundane concerns. As long as we callously turn our backs on those less fortunate than ourselves, we are among the lower animals.
   I suppose it is only the raving egomaniac who never questions his own importance in the grand scheme of things. Every now and then one encounters an individual convinced the world revolves around their needs and wants.
   I know I have friends who would miss me, were I gone. Some might even be distraught, and my co-workers would be temporarily inconvenienced. I don't really expect anyone beyond my immediate family to be devastated. Every one should be noticed: "Any man's death diminishes me, because I am involved Mankind; And therefore never send for whom the bell tolls; it tolls for thee.” (John Donne)
Recent tragedies, such as school shootings and weather disasters rightfully tug at heartstrings. Even celebrity deaths bring people together in grief.
   You may deem my reaction harsh, but I see no sense whatsoever in leaving stuffed toys, balloons and other mementos at the site of an incident. I think the money spent on such transient things would do more good given to a non-profit charity. This would have the added benefit of eliminating debris littering the area. A candlelight vigil is different; people sharing their sorrow, reaffirming that life goes on.
   Sometimes practicality is so misunderstood, but it seems to me a donation to a rehab center would be a fitting tribute for a person who overdosed. Instead of leaving a teddy bear at the site of a child's death, become a children's advocate ... at the very least, cherish your own children all the more.
   We need to consider that we are not alone on this planet or in this universe. How hard it is sometimes to lay arrogance aside, especially when one feels it is one's only suit of clothing and does not wish to appear before the world naked and vulnerable. In the wake of tragedy, heroes emerge.  Russell King Jr., a victim of the shooting in Chardon, Ohio was an organ donor. His family said, "...his heart still beats."
   Even more than I hope my heart continues to beat for a long time, I pray each beat will be lived in love and grace.

When it beats no more, I hope your life is better for having known me.

The Sisterhood of Invisible Women

   A friend posted to Facebook something one of her friends had shared:

   So, I have recently began to struggle some with the things I can no longer do as well as I used to along with feeling the hurt of no longer being "cute or pretty," not that I think I ever really was but the older you get, the more you really know you're not the "cute one." Have you ever thought: “I’m fat;” “I’m old;” “I’m not enough?” For me, all the time.
   I was young once. My brain sometimes forgets it no longer is. To all my female friends from 40 years and up: Most of us are going through the next phase of our lives. We're at that age when we see wrinkles, gray hair, and extra pounds. We see the cute 25-year-olds and reminisce. But we were also 25, just as they will one day be our age. We aren't the "girls in their summer clothes" anymore. What they bring to the table with their youth and zest, we bring with our wisdom and experience. We have raised families, run households, paid the bills, dealt with diseases, sadness, and everything else life has assigned us. Some of us have lost those that were nearest and dearest to us.
   We are survivors: warriors in the quiet. We are women, like a classic car or a fine wine. Even if our bodies aren't what they once were, they carry our souls, our courage, and our strength.
We shall all enter this chapter of our lives with humility, grace, and pride over everything we have been through, and we should never feel bad about getting older. It's a privilege that is denied to so many.🌻

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   Sometime ago, I began subscribing to a couple of e-newsletters: The Girl God, and Nonviolence News.

(from The Girl God)

“We live in a reversal society. For example, the idea that Eve came from Adam is a reversal. It’s ridiculous. Who could believe that? It’s contrary to all biology. But with that myth in mind, people can justify somehow the idea that God is male. And therefore that male is God. And that he’s the origin. But he’s not the origin. The Bible is full of reversals.” -Mary Daly

   Quality of life, should not depend on the "quality" of the package containing it. Perfectly good cornflakes come out of a box that got dropped a couple times. But unlike consumer products, people should not be "marked down" just because the packaging is a little dinged up. Western culture, and more specifically United States culture, seems really hung up on appearances. That hangup and resultant discrimination is abundantly apparent to every middle-aged, slightly dowdy, woman who has been denied a promotion or raise, in favor of a younger colleague. The suggestions of women are frequently dismissed as "unworkable" - yet are lauded as nothing short of brilliance, when made by a male. There may be vehement denial but I would submit it is the denial of a guilty conscience. For over one hundred years, March 8th has been recognized as International Women's Day. It has been demonstrated repeatedly that when women and girls do better, everyone benefits.
   The title of this piece came to me because I was feeling ignored but I knew it wasn't just me - and it isn't just women. We all have a tendency to get caught up in our own immediate microcosm and stop noticing the wonder, as well as the horror, going on around us. Yes, we need to wash our hands and substitute elbow bumps of Vulcan salutes for shaking hands. We also need to listen to people and celebrate the accomplishments of women; not assume that doctors, lawyers, or other authority figures are male; not assume that a woman is only a surrogate for some man who had "more important" things to do.
   If you only focus on changing/improving two areas of your life, be mindful and be kind; if that is more than you can handle, simply be kind: that alone, will make the world a better place.